12. Who pays for contraceptives?

Sorry it's been a few days since our last post. We had a long weekend and we're going to have another one this weekend too. So don't be mad. Just enjoy this piece:

There's a problem in the world today. Guys buy condoms, girls buy the pill. How the hell is that fair?


Jill: When I took birth control for the first time I was utterly convinced that I was poisoning myself, just waiting for the moment my ovaries would shrivel up and leave me sterile forever. Needless to say, this didn't happen. Instead I enjoyed a pretty liberal sexual life and blemish-free skin.

It wasn't all a walk in the park, though. I struggled for a while with, "Why do I have to pay for this? Why do I have to take this annoying little pill everyday at 8 o'clock with a little snack so my tummy doesn't hurt? What if one slips through the crack, and I have to deal with being pregnant? BIRTH CONTROL SUCKS! WHY ME?!"

I got over those issues, but did wonder if it was fair of me to have to dish out thirty bucks every month for the pre-packaged hormones that would keep me from housing a bun in the oven. As it turns out, on the inside I always wanted to ask my boyfriend at the time if he would go halfsies on it. I never did. I think I would have eventually, had we not broken up, or had I not gotten a better paying job.

I guess it goes like this: guys, it's nice when you do your part to keep us from getting pregnant (unless that's the goal, of course). If you aren't going to pay for a birth control prescription, at least offer half toward it, or suggest condoms. That's all we're asking. Because, unfortunately, life's a game of what's fair, and girls solely paying for contraceptives seems righteously unfair.


Erica: So here's the story of me and birth control... or lack there of. I've only bought contraceptives, condoms, maybe twice in my life. I had to pay for them using change from a can full of quarters intended for laundry. Don't be surprised - it was college. I did what I had to do. Then I started dating (and ultimately marrying) someone with a job and I didn't have to worry about the paying so much. But I had to worry about the using more than ever. And that one time I didn't use it, I got pregnant.

In the 60's, the feminist sexual freedom movement made women realize that we are responsible for our own bodies, that we can decide when we want to conceive. But in the same breath, it sucks when you're in a relationship and having to pay for the birth control just because you're the only one physically taking it. It sucks, all money issues do, but I have to say that if you want to be in control of your sexual integrity, you have to take care of it. Don't expect your significant (or insignificant) other to. Even if your partner has a lifetime supply of magnums; even if you watch your girl take her pill every mid-morning with brunch. If you don't want to end up in a helpless situation, take control! Cover your own ass (or dick) if you don't want to get an STD or get pregs.

Speaking of the devil, I had a pregnancy scare last week that really woke me up. Birth control is no longer an option, it's a necessity. Even though I'm married, and Dan would be right next to me (being way more excited than I'd like for him to be), I'm the one carrying the thing. I'm the one going to the gyne once a week. I'm the one that doesn't get to sleep at nightI'd be home with the new baby and a toddler all day, so I have to protect myself from that colicky, postpartum depression mess and bite the bullet. The sexual freedom movement quickly turned into the sexual responsibility movement. We have to protect ourselves even if it costs money. Go to a clinic and get government aid like the sixteen-year-olds with mothers in denial do.